Need a little advice

[Apollo510]

Yasou olous,

I'm new to this forum, and I was hoping to get some help with an issue I've been having. I am 27 yrs old, living in the San Francisco Bay Area where there is a sizeable Greek community. My father is from Greece and my mother is Greek American. We weren't very active in our church when I was a child, so I wasn't able to form a strong sense of community among many other Greek Americans.

Recently I've been trying to get more involved with my church and meet other young Greeks. I've been going to church events, local Greek Nights and other celebrations, but its hard going alone and feeling stuck on the sidelines. I've met a few people who I know on an acquaintance level, but haven't made any real friendships with them. It is important to me to be active in my community, and yet I feel like somewhat of an outsider. Almost all of the local Greeks have grown up with one another, and don't seem very willing to welcome new people into their circles.It's not that they are totally unfriendly, just a bit on the cold side. I try to engage them in more than "hi how are ya" conversation, but just end up feeling shunned.

I wish I had had the experience of growing up with Greek American friends, but it hasn't been the case. ...I'm wondering if anyone has had a similar experience with their fellow Greeks, and I'd really appreciate some advice on ways I might try to make better friends with those in my community.

Thanks
Apollon

[Prokomenos]

Keep at it. Hang out where they hang out and keep talking to them. I dont know what else to tell you.
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[Apollo510]

Thanks for your reply. Yeah, I guess it's best not to get too discouraged.

[amicus_verus]

hi appolon,

it's never easy to get into a "coterie" but if you keep at it i think you will get a part of this community. It was also hard for me to go to greece and get in contact with people whose language i don't speak (just a little bit).

greetz

AmicusVerus

[Apollyon]

here, in this forum, you always have buddies. if u have a <<connection>> problem with the hellenes in your region, just said them to join us here and we will make a great discussion about that problem...

[Napalm]

Try some of the neighbouring regions like Oakland and the Peninsula. I've seen Greek churches and restaurants there so their must be Greeks :-) . I know LA is a bit of a drive from there but if there is a really big Hellenic event there it might be worth checking out since many people from LA have SF connections as well.

[soulitaire]

I think its cool u want to meet other greeks and are doing something about it. Maybe you should take one of your friends along aswell next time? that way ur not always turning up alone . Just a thought .

Ive found greeks can be quite cliquey at times. My personal advice is to just be urself and dont try to fit in and 'be like them' too much , when ur not. Keep turning up to events and get togethers... and it'll just happen .


goodluck :-)

[Apollo510]

:s030:

I appreciate all the responses, guys.

Yeah, Napalm, there are many Greeks in Oakland, that's where I'm actually from, but they are very cliquey. I wonder why that seems to be a common quality amongst us? ...I know there's a Greek church in SF, maybe going to some of their events is also worth a try.

Soulitaire, I think that's a good idea to take one of my non-Greek friends along next time. I actually went to one Greek Night last March with a couple of my buddies who are African-American. I think they felt a little out of place amongst all us Greeks, but they seemed to have a good time. One of them actually met an Italian girl there who he started dating for a while.

It is also important, like you said, to just be who I am and enjoy the people I attract by acting naturally. ...You guys have really encouraged me to keep trying.

Euxaristo,
Apollo